Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Step Up

Torture's finally over.
& I am pleased to tell you that yes people, my 2 month long Facebook hiatus is a success.
And the funny thing is, I don't even miss going on Facebook. Hah.

This year has been one hell of a year. I mean it in a good and bad way.
I've had so much experience working with other people in producing the school magazine (PROOF READING. I HAD NO IDEA HOW LONG IT CAN TAKE), watched a World Cup match while talking on the phone at 2am, made new friends, bitched & complained, struggled through exams, went so high I reckoned that was how it felt like if I had been on drugs, have been hurt so bad I cried so hard & couldn't breathe.

So much has happened, that I find it impossible that all that has happened actually happened in one year.
For the first few months of the year, I was happy & sad. I didn't talk much about what I was going through and how I felt. I guess only a few close friends knew of my situation. I didn't feel like talking about it much because every time I did, I got all these weird um-I-don't-think-what-you're-doing-is-a-good-idea looks. I got so upset a few times along the way I didn't think it was possible for someone to feel that way. I thought that I would be able to go through with it. I even honestly thought it would last forever. But it didn't. Things were so complicated. I knew my friends subtly disapproved of it, & even mum thought what I was doing wasn't a good idea. So I ended it.

Then I decided I would take a few months off to attain closure. Just relax and be myself, you know. But before I could do so I felt pressurised. I felt pushed around. I felt all this unwanted attention thrown upon me. I'm sorry for putting Pei, Mich and especially Aaron through all the "complaining". Honestly I didn't even see it as complaining. Talking about it was just my way of dealing with it.
I thought I got over the whole complicated situation, but really I didn't.
For the past few months, I was in dilemma. I didn't know what to do and I didn't know who to confide in.
I felt confused, and stupid and idiotic. There were times where my thoughts would suddenly drift off and I would find myself in a depressed mood, where moments ago, I'd been the happiest girl on earth.
In the end I found myself confiding in 2 friends, both of whom (no offence & unfortunately) didn't give me the advice I was looking for. The "oh you'll be fine, you can settle this whole thing yourself/ don't think so much about this. time to get back to studying bye!" response wasn't exactly the best advice. I don't think anyone knew what I was really going through. I guess this just shows that you can never tell what's truly beneath a countenance.
In the end I made a total fool of myself by sending out a couple of emails. I probably sounded crazy, stalker-ish and freaky to the recipient. I shall not mention your name here but if you ever happen to stumble across this post I'm really sorry.

So after all that hullabaloo (aka crying & thinking & crying & thinking), I've decided that the best thing right now would be to forget all that has happened, & make a fresh new start.
I NEED CHANGE. I NEED SOMETHING NEW & PRETTY TO DISTRACT ME FROM WHATEVER HAS HAPPENED.
& what better way to make a new start than to start a new blog? (the blog name is just something random I came up with. I like mint & elephants.)
Change is the best way to initiate new beginnings.
:)

It doesn't matter if you don't understand what I'm talking about, it is totally unimportant now. 
What's important is that Rachel has finally achieved closure. :)

Saturday, July 24, 2010

A Smile On Your Face

I think I'm losing it. 

And if I'm not losing it I think sooner or later I will lose it, or at least start to lose it.

I need to compose myself. I need to, um, go to a far far away place and relax and get my groove and bounce back faster and stronger than I've ever bounced back before.
Reminder: Trials are less than 2 months away, SPM is about 4 months away, I can barely keep up with my studies, I don't have a photographic memory, I wish I had a photographic memory, I'm never going to get a scholarship, I'll disappoint my parents, I'll die without ever getting my dream job or ever publishing a novel, I'll have to get 99 cats to live with me and I'll die alone, old and hagged and wrinkly. :(

But well, this time the case is different. Instead of whining and telling you that I had better start studying, this time I'll tell you that I HAVE started studying. I mean, face the facts: besides the super geniuses, who hasn't?
Unfortunately, with the speed I'm going, I'll only be able to finish studying by the age of 73. 
But I can't help it! Everytime I sit down with a textbook or a reference book I have the tendency to go through every passage/paragraph in detail or at least until I can remember the important points. 
Hence the regret that I didn't start revising earlier and curse my self-confidence. I was so sure this was going to be another PMR year, that I would be able to finish studying everything in time. But I'm beginning to think otherwise. :S
Furthermore I still have so many things to do: layouts to design and to make sure they get designed and are handed in on time, data to gather and to arrange them properly, all in all- to make sure I do my part in the publishing of the yearbook before graduation. 

But you know what? Heck, I can do this. Nothing in this world is impossible, nothing in this world in unachievable. We're humans, top of the food chain, the ones who can do anything, who are the smartest living creatures on this earth and also the dumbest. But that's beside the point. The point is that, well, if Einstein can discover that E equals to MC square and Edison the lightbulb, then I bloody well can do this. :)

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Absolutely Fantastic

Fantastic Mr. Fox is most probably the best cartoon movie ever made (next to PIXAR movies, of course).
The story is absolutely ridiculous, but that's what makes it so great. :)



It's a child's story, spiced with a little humour, and the animation is simply marvellous.
All the characters in the movie are like little doll house figures, made of clay/plastic with details of fur and features etched upon them. Basically, the movie is as if it's directed by a little girl who's playing a story written by Roald Dahl with her animal dolls. It's adorable. :D

Fantastic Mr. Fox is just a simple story of how a fox pretty much screws his life up, bringing trouble to the other animals of the land and how all of them deal with it. I guess it's something you can sort of relate to in life. People screw up all the time, unintentionally making other people suffer for their mistakes and they try to fix it, to turn everything right again. I mean, these things happen, right?

So yes, all I'm saying is, this is a fantastic movie, and um, go watch it. :)

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Those Voices Around Me

I've got a headache.
I need a peaceful afternoon where I can just sit and enjoy the silence.

Ah well.
I guess not today. :(

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Holiday Chores

I guess the holidays aren't as bad as I thought they would be.
Sure, I spent the first whoknowshowmanydays sitting in front of the computer every day downloading movies while everyone else is off on vacation.

Honestly speaking, I didn't think I would be able to go out at all this holiday, based on the fact that my parents are holidaying Europe (Italy, Paris and Amsterdam) for about 2 weeks (they left one day after school holiday started and will be coming back one day before school semester starts). Therefore any outings will require finding of own transport.
Why didn't my parents bring my sister and I along, you ask?
Well, they reckoned that we should stay home and study for the exams since the school exams were originally planned to have a 2 week torturous holiday break in between. Furthermore, it was a friends-only trip: a chance for my parents to spend a crazy holiday with their friends ("crazy" will only go as far as shopping, reminiscing the old university days and numerous laughter I suppose) before they get too old or bones too stiff to travel abroad.
So yes, this is not reckless abandonment as my parents have invited my aunt from Melaka to take care of us for the holidays.

And so far I've gone out to a birthday party, will be going out tomorrow for a movie and I've found out that my aunt actually does not mind me taking public transport (YES!), unlike my parents.
This is a really good/really bad thing. This means that I can walk to the LRT station which is about 15 minutes from my house and take a shuttle bus/cab/LRT to OneUtama, TheCurve, KLCC or Tropicana City at free will but also increase the risk of kidnapping on the way to one of the destinations stated above because I will most probably be going alone. My sister and I have this agreement that if one of us is going out, the other would have to stay at home to accompany my aunt, thus no sister-shopping for us this holiday. :(
So as an obedient daughter, I will try not to take public transport if I can help it. :)

Anyway, time to watch some more movies and turn in early later.
:)

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Card In A Cardbox

I found this laminated olive bordered card in a cardbox in the study.

On the very top of the laminated card are the words Winners vs Losers, something my dad would definitely buy and paste on the doors of my mum's gigantic bookshelf. There's also one here that says 8 Gifts That Do Not Cost A Cent. It's actually a good daily reminder to anyone who reads the cards.

Winner vs Losers
When a winner makes a mistake, he says, "I was wrong."
When a loser makes a mistake, he says, "It wasn't my fault."
A winner works harder than a loser and has more time;
A loser is always "too busy" to do what is necessary;
A winner goes through a problem;
A loser goes around it, and never gets pass it;
A winner makes commitments;
A loser makes promises;
A winner says, "I'm good, but not as good as I ought to be.";
A loser says, "I'm not as bad as a lot of other people.";
A winner respects those who are superior to him and tries to learn something from them;
A loser resents those who are superior to him and tries to find chinks in their armour;
A winner feels responsible for more than his job;
A loser says, "I only work here.";
A winner says, "There ought to be a better way to do it.";
A loser says "That's the way it's always been done here.";

I feel like a philosopher now! ;)

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Mid Valley Friday

This is a post long due, whoops. 
Last Friday, Jess, Mindy, Michelle, Grace, Pei and I headed off to Mid Valley to watch Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time and Shrek: Forever After.

 Jake Gyllenhaal has nice abs. :) Not to mention he looks quite good in that shoulder-length brunette wig. Haha. The movie plot was better than I expected, I guess Jerry Bruckheimer turned a Disney movie into something more than just a kiddy movie. But if I were to remember something in this movie it would only have to be Jake Gyllenhaal jumping off roofs fighting his way for freedom, Gemma Arterton's unique accent and the creepy uncle's mascara-ed eyes. -.-

Shrek: Forever After was just as nice as Prince of Persia, though I cannot tell you which is the better one if you asked me, because I like both just the same. :) You just can't compare an ogre fairytale to a good-looking prince. ;)
However, Shrek wasn't as funny as the first and second Shrek movies. :S I distinctly remember laughing a whole lot more in the first and second movie. Unfortunately, I don't remember much about the third movie, so we'll leave that out of the review for now. :)
Puss In Boots as a fat kitty in a pink ribbon was definitely the best change (out of all the character changes) in the movie. He's just as lovable as when he was a heroic cat in boots. Donkey wasn't all that annoying anymore, though I'm not sure whether to feel pleased or disappointed with that. -.-
I like Gingy as a gladiator Gingerbread man though (picture above), that was awesome, haha.
And I think Princess Fiona got a bit...plumper. :/

Right. Next to watch: Little Manhattan and Narnia: Prince Caspian. :)

Monday, June 7, 2010

If I Could Turn Back Time,

I would visit the Seven Ancient Wonders of the World.
Out of the 7, only the Great Pyramid of Giza still stands bold and strong on the deserts of Egypt.
The other 6 have been unfortunately perished in earthquakes and fires or else destroyed by some dude(s) who did not have the brains to think of preserving the Wonders for future references.

And as you might have expected, this blog post is to promote the Seven Ancient Wonders of the World, and I am doing so because I feel bored ahaha. ;)

The Great Pyramid of Giza
It was built as a tomb for the Pharaoh Khufu (hey, we studied him in history!), has two chambers and an entrance. I never knew that we could actually enter the pyramid! :D I always thought that they built it by using rocks, stuffed the King and Queen inside the pyramid and then used rocks to cover the whole thing up again. I don't think the original entrance can be used anymore. Tourists who want to enter the pyramid have to enter through this alternate entrance built by this dude. Oh well, you learn something new every day. :)

The Hanging Gardens of Babylon
Was built by Nebuchadnezzar II (we studied him in history too!) for his homesick wife Amytis of Media. It was really long and really wide, multi-levelled and was said to resemble a theatre. There're vaults constructed under the terraces of the garden which carried the entire weight of the garden and made it look like it was floating, hence the name. Lots of trees were planted, the soil and soft and red, water flowing everywhere- you get the point. It was a garden beautiful enough to charm anyone into staying there for ever and ever. Like El Dorado, The City of Gold. :)

Statue of Zeus at Olympia
They have a 12m tall statue of Zeus in the Temple of Zeus, Olympia! The statue takes up pretty much the whole temple and in Zeus's right hand he holds a small statue of the Goddess of Victory, Nike and in his left hand a golden sceptre. It was crafted by a Greek sculptor, Phidias.
The cause of destruction is a debate. Some reckoned it was destroyed by this Roman Emperor Caligula, who wanted his head on all the famous statues of the gods because he decided himself worthier of them. Others think it was perished in a disastrous fire.

Temple of Artemis
It was dedicated to the Greek Goddess Artemis, Goddess of the Moon, twin to Apollo the Sun God and it took 120 years to built the temple. But it was destroyed in one snap by this guy called Herostratus. He torched the temple just so he could get famous. It was rebuilt by Alexander the Great, only to be destroyed by the Goths. Rebuilt again but it was closed and destroyed by a mob led by St John Chrysotom.
I don't think Artemis could've been that popular in those days, if her temple was to be built and destroyed three times. :S

Mausoleum of Halicarnassus 
It was built as a tomb for Mausolus, a leader in the Persian Empire, very much like the Pyramid of Gize I suppose. Halicarnassus is a city constructed by Mausolus and his wife Artemisia. After Mausolus died Artemisia was heartbroken, so she decided to built him this huge tomb. She took over the job as ruler of Halicarnassus, and she even won this war against the Rhodians. She died two years after her husband died, and their urns were put into the tomb. As a sacrifice ritual bodies of dead animals were put on the stone steps of the tomb and then sealed with stones and rubble. The tomb was built on a hill overlooking the city, which bytheway is a very nice place to have your ashes put after you die.

Colossus of Rhodes
It's a statue of the Greek god Helios (we read about him too!). It stood over 30 metres high, making it the tallest statues of the ancient world. It started with the Siege of Rhodes, and the Rhodians won. In order to celebrate their victory, they constructed this GIANT statue of Helios. It was destroyed in an earthquake, and was offered the money by Ptolemy III to rebuild the statue. But the Rhodians, who feared that they have insulted Helios the God, declined.

Lighthouse of Alexandria
Also known as Pharos of Alexandria, Pharos is a Latin word for 'lighthouse'. There is nothing very much interesting in this lighthouse, for it was ever just a lighthouse.